The Pursuit of Happiness: The Life/Work Balance
Why You Have to Start Pursuing Your Happiness Now
Something that i am currently pursuing now and something that you should know that you need to care for yourself more with your happiness because keeping your LifeWork balance is essential to your productivity.
let’s talk about my friend Jae. Jae is an ordinary person living in this world, and he often talks about how unhappy he is during high school. He said that if he graduated high school, then he will be happy. Jae graduated high school and enter university, but Jae still not satisfied. Later then he said that if he graduated and got a job, then he will be happy. Okay, so Jae graduated, and then Jae got a job, which Jae should be happy, right? No, he still unhappy at this point, and later, he said that he would be satisfied when he settled down and have kids. So two years later, Jae got married to amazing women and then blessed with quintuplet beautiful daughters. Is he happy now? No, in an amid drunkness, he rambled that he is still unhappy, and Jae said he would be pleased if seeing his daughters moved out later. Fast forward 20 years later, his five children all moved out, which some of them married to a fantastic person and left the big apartment for only him and his wife, which then he said that the apartment is too big for both of them because he felt empty. He still unhappy until now. The last time i met Jae was during Sunday Church, which he sat alone, and i sat beside him, we had small talk, and he told me that his wife passed away one year ago, and he’s living alone on a small house with a nurse. I asked him, after all, he’s been through, does Jae now happy? No, he is not happy, and the sad thing is Jae said that he knows that he will be happy after he dies. 2 Months later, Jae died due to a heart attack on Monday morning. His family attends his funeral, which then turns out he is a lucky man after all! His first daughter became a famous actress appears on many T.V. series and T.V. ads; His second daughter became a top pastier and chocolatiers for a 5-star hotel. His third daughter flew over from Egypt because she is now one of the archeologist teams that currently digs Cleopatra’s tomb at Alexandria. His fourth daughter married a great man and soon become a P.E. teacher on one of highschool in the city, and the fifth daughter settled down with a great guy and living her life as a great wife. But the real question is, why Jae was never happy in his life?
If you realize that this is a fictional story, there are two possibilities: either you a realist person that understands that is very little chance for human giving birth to 5 children at once, or you are a Japanese weeb. But dont get me wrong; Jae is real, Jae is replaceable with Me, or you or your friends or anybody because Jae is Just About Everybody. We as human tends to think that if we work hard now, we got happiness later, but most of us don’t believe that what happened if you work hard unhappily? The study says that if you are unhappy and working, your production will decrease, your deliverables will suffer and you will starting to hate your job. Millennials hate their job, and then what? Job hopping happened! “I dont like this job, so i switch position, then i switch again and again and again,” but to what extent? Do we as Millenials keep doing this forever? Even after we got kids and more responsibilities? “No,”? Stop lying to yourself! “Dude, why do you even know about this anyway?” Well, It’s because i am in this situation right now!
I am not proud of it, but after i am working on this very job I’ve been working on, i starting to hate what i am passionate about. Because of what? Because at i started unhappily. I love my family, but i think i sacrificed too much for them that also hurts them in indirect ways. I kept job-hopping, lying to myself that “i did this for my family, “but mostly, it’s because of me. Career switch over and over again until i broke down recently, then i started to hate what i am passionate about; Gaming. For me, this is a big “Panic Monster” pushed the button to scared that “delusional monkeys” and “procrastinate monkeys” away. I neglected all my daily games, even lying to my friends that have big hopes for me to achieve a high score on Clan Battle. I am totaled until God decided to pull “the healthy plug” on me and got me bedridden for two days.
I read a lot of articles on my bedridden time, and one of them is the idea that happiness is essential for you and your productivity. At that time i cried so hard because i know i worked hard for nothing, and i do hope this time i am not wrong.
LifeWork Balance
For professionals like us, we do know that work-life balance is needed to succeed in your work. For me, it is a bullshit concept that wants you to live to work instead of work to live. The idea should be balancing your life first to your work and not the other way around. Because when you are focusing on your happiness first, you know your work is exponential will be better. With happy you, more productivity, more creativity, amazing results that await you in the end. That’s why dont you ever worked hard for nothing like me. Optimistic people will get more significant results than pessimistic people. “But Dim, i am not pessimistic, i am realistic!” Stop lying to yourself, and you know you are a pessimist!
“So Dim, i wanted to start pursuing my happiness for my career, but i dont know where to start? “hmm, great question! I have three answers for three different scenarios for you!
So I worked on the job that i didn’t like but i have to do it because i need money. So what should i do?
O…kay, this is what happens to me back then, at this point, you need money so much, but you can’t let go of your work. The problem is you dont like the job that you have now. At this point, Pour your love into the job, and then you will starting love the job. For example, if you are working on Social media like me, and you hated that you have to design all of the editorial planning. You know you hate the design, but i know you dont hate design as wholely, but you hate that you have to work on the design process. For me, you need to explore more options that would be suitable for your problem. Hates doing design? You can use an application such as Adobe Spark to automated do it, or for something that needs more attention, you have to commish to someone that you know. It’s not easy, but if you pour love into your work, i know that you can do it.
So uhmm, i have money to get by but i really dont like my job right now. What do i have to do?
Nice question! Others would often say that “Yeah, go on, move to another job” or something, but i am not like others. I would be likely to ask, “Are you hates your job? Or you uncomfortable with them?” Because its a very different thing that you hate your job and something on the job makes you uncomfortable, which later your brain translated into “i hate this job.” Trust me, i been there on both, and all of them i ran away like a coward!
If your answer that you hate the job, then change it! Find the job that you love because its time for you to earn it! You know you deserved a better job and a better life! But if you answer you’re uncomfortable with them, please communicate with your coworkers that you feel uncomfortable. I know that especially in Indonesia, we tend to keep silent to something that we dont like, and that silence will become toxic. Solve your problem first, and then you pour your job with love, as i explain above! I know you can do it!
I worked on something that i love but i am still unhappy. What should i do?
You are just like me! I am now working at an Esport company, but i am still not happy. Then what should i do? You already pour your love to your work, but again, you left you unhappiness in your heart, then what? This is the trickiest part because this is not the right or wrong answer. For me, i have always been an analytical person that sees problems and then working on the solution, but i am unable to find a problem in me, then what? Seek a third party opinion on this one, but not your friends, your parents or your girlfriend, or anything closely related to you. Find yourself a psychiatrist or psychologist’s opinion because they matter more! “BUT BUT DIM, IM NOT CRAZY WHY SHOULD I GO TO PYSCHYATRIST?” Well, you dont need to be crazy to go to them. Everybody is unique at some point, “crazy” if the uniqueness starts to hurts people a lot or hurts yourself. At this stage, you are not crazy, but you need to hear other people’s opinions. Don’ worry because they kept your secret forever, unlike your friend.
Last Question please, uhmm i dont know if i can do this, why you are so sure about this?
It seems like you still dont believe in yourself. That’s are fine to admit it because it’s better than you lie to yourself. Here is what I’m going to tell you. Dont believe in yourself because you have that doubt, but belief in me that believes in you can make it! Because i do not doubt that you will succeed and become a better person that i do.
If you manage to balance your life to your work, I can’t guarantee the results, but in my beliefs, God always puts the hardship, and there will be ease. That verse repeated twice on holy books, so i know that it’s a sure promise from God. If you do happy and work hard, i am sure that something good will be yours!
So don’t worry and be happy!
Hi, It’s me, Dimas Notowidjojo, with another anti motivate motivate article for you! I always believe that if you help someone, you make someone happy and that because of someone happy, I’ll be happy as well.
So if you think that these articles reached out to you, please give some love and share it to other people you think that need it!
